Please feel free to call upon my services if you need help with disposing of old clothes, phones (I’m in need of a new iphone), cars, yachts or any other objects that no longer hold value to you.
Also if you are ever in need of an extra person for say a laser tag team, bowling team, yacht club member, or any other activity (I am bunches of fun at the beach) I would be more than happy to help you out with that also.
Do not worry about inconveniencing me, the act of charity is payment enough.
A true friend
p.s. skills may be requested upon inquiry - they include but are not limited to:
- sarcastic/witty remarks
- self deprecating humor
- a decent Christopher Walken, Elmer Fudd, Lion from Wizard of Oz, and Tasmanian Devil impression